She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman

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You might have seen and met her. She’s the woman who is self-employed, doing the thing she loves, and making a living off of it. She’s the woman who might have decided to have a normal career, with a twist. It’s the type of career she enjoys and she is actually appreciated for the hard work and hours she puts into it. When she speaks, others listen, even the men in her office with overinflated egos. Her job almost never feels like work and is deeply fulfilling. It doesn’t cost her energy; she gets energy from it. When she wakes up, she can’t wait to get started with her day. In addition to foreplay, there are two other stages of the sexual experience that will take your sex life to a whole new level.

So what can you do to achieve your goal of making a woman orgasm? Focus on what your tongue can do. Some argue that the G-spot is in the vagina and that’s where the best orgasms happen. But the G-spot is actually part of the clitoris, and the reason it sets of pleasure signals is because it gets stimulated during intercourse. Written by Amy Sohn. Who, in case you don’t know, is a great columnist and a well-received author of erotic novels. And – in this case, even more importantly – a woman! She knows how to set the world to her hand, so it seems, and some women wonder how she does it. That’s what this book is about, I’ll uncover her strategies. I’ve been studying and interviewing her for so long now that I can’t wait to share everything with you. So while Kerner uses the linear four-phase model to explain the female sexual response process, his explanation of the resolution stage suggests that he actually views the female sexual response process as cyclical, not linear. How to Achieve Female OrgasmThe first one you know well. The second one is the cunnilingus and it’s a six-stage procedure. The last one follows the female orgasm. And is the only stage where intercourse comes in question. Never Forget These Three Assurances Ideas regarding sex in traditional mainstream culture are centered around male anatomy and satisfaction—penetration is the pinnacle of sex, and sex is over when the man ejaculates. However, Ian Kerner explains that these beliefs often leave women unsatisfied. In She Comes First, Kerner explains that for sex to adequately satisfy both partners, we must change the narrative—men should ensure their female partner orgasms first. And the best way to accomplish this, Kerner argues, is through cunnilingus.

Some people refer to the clitoris as the happy maker, orgasm switch, or love button. That might make it seem easy to simply push it to give a woman an orgasm, but it’s more complex than that. Shortform note: Kerner mentions that some women may enjoy anal and perineal stimulation. Experts elaborate that some women actually prefer stimulation in these spots over clitoral stimulation, and can orgasm from this alone. This is called an anal orgasm. If your partner thinks she may prefer anal stimulation or wants to try having an anal orgasm, experts recommend stimulating the anal region with your tongue, fingers, or toys like anal plugs, beads, or vibrators.) Step #4: Approaching Orgasm Most believe that the key to good sex is long, hard penetration. But to orgasm, a woman needs to have her clitoris stimulated.You can stimulate each of these parts during sex for maximum pleasure, but you’ve got to set the stage and plan on the right acts, which is what you’ll learn next. Lesson 3: Don’t just think of sex in terms of foreplay and intercourse, it’s about foreplay, coreplay, and moreplay. If you think that size matters – you can’t be further from the truth! Not just size – penetration doesn’t matter either as far as women are concerned. Science says that female orgasm is something which happens only after clitoral stimulation. Adjust your fingers. You can add a third finger depending on what’s comfortable for her. You can also use your thumb to stimulate the anus or press her perineum.